“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
i sell unbelievable combs.
do you know who’s cute? read the last word me
yea girl wash my tires in the bathtub its the only way i can get off
do not fall in love with people like me.
i will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. i will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. and when i leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.
when someone tells you “sorry haha i stopped listening”
Me: *at a white persons house*
Friend: my moms making dinner.. Spaghetti with ketchup
Me: my mom said I gotta come home right now immediately
"How are your grades?"
"What are you majoring in?"
"Have you got a girlfriend?"
"What do you want to do when you graduate?"
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